Today has been the same as yesterday. Had a panic attack so didn't make it to sixth form. Then I was frustrated because i didn't go. So i sat around all day eating, watching Bondi Rescue and making the occasional cake. Fun. I feel a bit more upbeat at the moment, i don't know why or how :') Tomorrow i have a parents evening, which will be awkward as I'm probably failing psychology as i haven't been to a lesson for over a month. Damn! I'm hoping that i can catch up pretty quick because (not to be big headed) I'm quite smart. I am worried about tomorrow because i think I'll find out if i can still do psychology. I'm pretty gutted all of this illness crap came around because I was expected high grades in my a levels! But i tell myself, i will get to where i want to be, it just might take a bit longer!
All i want to do is be in Australia! It's became an obsession, i just keep thinking how things would be diffferent in Australia! I might still have the illness but at least i could go for a walk and clear my head without being scared. The peace would also be grand, around here it feels like chaos all the time. Don't really know what else to write because at the moment it feels like, the same old shit, just a different day!
I'm getting a little bit excited for Christmas now! I like the whole family atmosphere, not just the presents. I also haven't bought a single Christmas present for anyone yet, hopefully I'm going shopping tomorrow to get some, it just depends if i get there!
Well I'm of to do a little jog and a bike ride, in my bedroom! :(
night all
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